It had a keypad and we all had the code, so no one outside our company could get in. There were about 40 of us and the break room was in a separate part of the building. He ended up in Employee Health again and was slapped with a 2 week suspension for theft from co-workers.
The janitor, convinced I was using a different mustard, gladly consumed a half full tablespoon to prove I was lying. I offered to let anyone else in the room taste it to prove it was the same mustard. I proved that I had intended to eat my lunch by consuming a full tablespoon of the mustard in front of the committee without issue. I’m carrying complaints from about a dozen co-workers about lunch theft and he’s accusing me of booby-trapping my lunch (which I was technically guilty of). We both go before the resolution committee. Apparently he had made it about 3/4 of the way through the sandwich before it hit him. One of the janitors in our area ends up in Employee Health because he can’t get the burning in his mouth to stop and is having trouble with his stomach.
I ate sandwiches with this mustard on it for about a week and a half before my lunch went missing mid-morning. This created a mustard that was analogous to Dave’s Insanity Sauce, which is something I can eat without much issue but will drop most of the people I work with. I created my own home-made mustard using a bottle of spicy brown mustard and 1/4 cup habenero powder (The real stuff, not the stuff you get from the supermarket that is really made from 90% Jalapeño). I have an amazing tolerance for spicy food and having spicy food tolerance is rare in Wisconsin. People don’t steal my food at work anymore. Obviously I won’t be here tomorrow or Thursday, so if I’m not back later today, I’ll see you on the other side. I’ll have my iPhone, so I might stop by while poolside, but my comments won’t be nesting. I’m going to finish my coffee then head out to the pool. :melodramatically pretends to wipe away a tear:
Distraction aside, I’m not sure I would have gotten through these past two months without you all. So, anyway, what I’m saying is, I’m glad I decided to join the commenting community when I did. Eventually I just decided that if I was going to take a break, which was often necessary, it may as well be to stop by here. Some days it was the only thing keeping me sane. I meant to go on hiatus from this site a couple weeks ago, but I couldn’t stay away.
Not just with the encouragement, but with the humor and stress relief too. I just want to say you guys have been really great this whole time. I’m supposed to relax today, so that’s what I’ll be doing…out by the pool. Which they managed to toss out the window for Airplane 2.
The parody lets you skip 7 or 8 otherwise wasted movie tix, and you need not worry if you have to stop and make supper, entertain your neighbors, have a tornado knock over nearby houses, it’s not like the plot line will be hard to pick up again.Ĭontrast that to Airplane!, which was a carefully constructed humorous device using the best of the campiness contained in the “airline disaster” movie genre from the 50-60s. So, it’s almost easier to skip the ‘real’ movie, and wait for the parody movie on cable. QT’s silly movie last summer because, apparently “Dirty Dozen” did not have enough industry inside jokes or pointless violence and had far too much historical accuracy for the h’wood hipsters (even to the point of having an obvious misspelling in the title). So that even the serious movies wind up pointlessly satirical, and not even to a dark-humor end.
So the movies turn into “cartoons” about other movies. The gentle sound of *Hrrffff Heruruff* can be heard from off camera as the screen fades to black.īack to screenwriters writing what they know, and all they know is only a week old. Now if you’ll excuse me from this depraved-Ĭat: Oh you did not just take the picture with me in it! That tears it, I know you aren’t wearing your shoes right now! *Cat runs from the room* Imma be a star!Ĭat: Whatever you say, madam. Reflectopornstarlett: Damn it kitteh! Don’t call me Shirley. Reflectopornstarlett: Shut up kitteh! I gonna be a star! They see me in my underware on craigslist and they put me in there movie! See, is reflecting my hawtness!!1!Ĭat: Surely there are more productive and direct ways of getting scantily clad images of yourself on the internet? It seems needlessly obtuse to put a fake advertisement in obscure hoping to be noticed by a movie producer in the off chance he needs a blurry girl in her underwear for his next feature. Cat: Madam, why are you taking a picture of our wardrobe while adorned only in your knickers? Surely you can operate a camera with a full compliment of clothing?